This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
