she was so not down for the gang bang
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
