I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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