Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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