There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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