Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize