just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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