she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
