She's JV to your varsity
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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