It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
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