i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Quick, to the slutcave!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
