break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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