Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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