Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I came so hard my ears popped.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
