Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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