You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
