I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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