i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
