it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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