dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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