why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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