what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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