white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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