I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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