covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
