you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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