What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize
