You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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