There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
