No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
