my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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