walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
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