I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
