I don't think brook has ever known best
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
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Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
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After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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