Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Randomize
