I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
