umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
