A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
