i just google imaged poop.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
