Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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