At least make sure they are 18
Why
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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