The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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