i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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