Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
FUCK WHALES
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
