Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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