Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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