Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Randomize
