Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
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i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize