margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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