Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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