She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
